When Jori was...like a week or two old, I scurried to the Provo City Library and checked out all these books on having a baby, how to care for babies, how to calm fussy ones, and how to get them to sleep. The books have included "On Becoming Babywise," "The Sleep Lady's Good Night, Sleep Tight," "What to Expect: the First Year," "The Baby Sleep Solution: A Proven Program to Teach Your Baby to Sleep Twelve Hours a Night," and "the Happiest Baby on the Block" (which I didn't read, but instead later checked out the DVD and watched it. I also have heard of and watched a few youtube videos about the 'Dunstan Baby Language,' which is claiming newborns basically have 5 words and we can learn to recognize them so we know what they need.
What has this made me?
FRUSTRATED!!
I read them and feel calm and knowledgable. Then I try to apply their concepts and get nowhere. Which could mean they just don't work, or I'm not doing them right.
arg.
Honest, I'd LIKE to have Jori on a real schedule. And I'd LOVE her to be able to sleep through the night. But I have no idea how to make it all work.
Maybe it's because she has acid reflux? I don't know.
Have I talked about that? We think she may have acid reflux, but aren't positive. We did get her on some medicine, but I'm not sure if it makes a difference. Here's why we think she may:
- she spits up A LOT
- she doesn't like being put down. This may be getting better though? because sometimes she'll let us for a little while, sometimes she won't. my days blend together so who knows.
- she often cries after eating-but not forever, I can usually calm her, so again who knows
- sometimes after she's been calm, she makes a noise like something's in her throat, then starts crying really loud
- she toots a lot. maybe that's nothing, but i think it could reflect tummy troubles.
the problem is, I may just be seeing what I want to see, ya know? It could be that she's just normal, but because she's my first and I find having a newborn to be very hard, I'm hoping she has acid reflux because that would mean there's a cause for it and it's solvable. I guess I'm just like my brother, Dan: my mom said with their daughter Evie (who had acid reflux), he had a hard time because he wanted a solution. He's a solver. And sometimes babies just cry-sometimes there's no thing to solve. But in THEIR case there was-with strong enough medicine, she was a totally different baby.
So am I just a whiner??
Wow now I feel really discouraged. Sorry for the downer post-I guess I just needed to vent.
I think the hardest thing about being a mom for me is I want to do it right, but there isn't necessarily a right and a wrong. I mean obviously abuse is wrong and to feed them is right, but other than that...who knows?
oi.
Oh for the days when Jori is 3 or 4 months old, and has grown out of most of her newborn fussiness! *sigh.*
I still hate the parenting books...my toddler doesn't respond to all the 'proven' methods of discipline, the other won't talk. I think those books make you feel down, just remember that your child thinks you are the best mother in the world and that's what really counts. Sorry about the fussiness, have you tried cutting out any foods from your diet? Becky's baby had acid reflux and is lactose intolerant so the medicine only helped a little until they figured out about the lactose. I hope it all gets figured out soon.
ReplyDeleteI couldn't get Benson to sleep and I read 7 books so I feel your pain! Here is the basic concept that helped me--babies need to have their crib be the last memory they have when going to sleep so when they wake up at night they will be comfortable and go back to sleep. Even if it is only for a few drowsy seconds. And good luck with the acid reflux. I hope it gets better. And for the record I never never read parenting books anymore! I'm sure your instincts are right. Just do what feels best.
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